Just Another Store…and Other Unrelated Things

Today was eventful.  Here’s a recap.  Not sure I can handle any more than a brief recap.

I loved Ikea.  I love the stuff I bought.  At the end of the day, it’s just another store.  And I now have more stuff.

I watched a BMW drive by and thought of the wise words of Husband.  It’s just a hunk of metal, plastic, and other parts…just like all the cars.  Since when did a name make it more cool.  I think God must look at us like we’re a bunch of crazies chasing after metal and plastic and stuff just cuz it’s painted certain colors with certain letters on it.  Lame.

A crazy creeper came to the fountain where Hannah & I were sitting and spread out random business cards along the rocks.  Then they blew away.  People are weird.

I have a strong-willed child.  I am a strong-willed child myself when she throws fits and I can’t force her into submission.  I then usually throw a fit myself because she won’t obey me.  I am not a great example of how to restrain your emotions.  Ugh.

I often respond out of ANTICIPATION of others’ judgement of me.

I don’t sleep.  Well, not well anyways.  Sucks that I have a sleep disorder.  I finally am starting to accept that I probably will never sleep well and that 8 hours of continuous pain-free sleep is a myth for me.  😦  😦  (That’s a double sad face in bold because I’m really sad.)

I have an ugly sinful heart and my God loves me all-the-time-no-matter-what.  And that’s what I tell my Banana, “I-love-you-all-the-time-no-matter-what.”

How do I live in that place instead of in the place of anticipation of others judgement?  Does anyone’s judgement of me matter?  ha  I am not judged a sinner condemned to hell by the God of the universe because the gospel and blood of Jesus covers my sinful ugly heart.  So, why the the hell would anyone else’s judgement mean a damn thing to me if it can’t, in fact, damn me to hell?  And you know, all I can think as I type those words is fear of people’s judgement of that sentence.  Ridiculous.  Jesus, change my heart, because, you, God of the universe, already love me “all-the-time-no-matter-what”.


Do you fear judgement from others?



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