We. Don’t. Know. What. We’re. Doing.
Really, we don’t know. We are thinking adoption is next.
We’d like to raise a little boy. Ok, maybe Husband wants that more than I do. Boys scare me. They are wild, crazy, bleed, and have a penis. I’m just not sure I’m ready for all that.
However, in this house we can only adopt a little girl. Dang. I mean, whew, sigh of relief, for now. I doubt very seriously that I’ll get off the hook that easy.
I really want to adopt from South Korea. They mostly adopt little boys and you can’t select a gender. That’s out.
Do we want an infant? Well, not really. But if we do, we’ll have to adopt domestically. That makes me nervous. That means somewhere down the line there will be the I-want-to-meet-my-birth-parents conversation. I’m not sure I can handle that to be super honest. Ha, like I’m not usually super honest.
I would love to adopt internationally, but shoot, that is crazy expensive. And I’m going to have to have a different car, because mine is so small that I literally cannot fit 3 carseats in the back seat. How will we afford that all?
And from what country???
When? Where? How much does it cost? Can we do fundraising? Is this what God is calling us to? Are we totally crazy? Do we really believe this is for us? How will our girls handle all this? How will we handle the travel to pick up our new child? What if the new child is ugly? C’mon, don’t tell me that doesn’t cross other people’s minds.
I have always felt very strongly that we would one day adopt.
Husband is still a little doubtful that it will work out and he doesn’t have much hope. Do I have the faith and hope to get us to the point where God redeems and restores husbands hope and faith?
I have a feeling that I’m not going to get any answers, at least not until we start stepping out in faith. Ugh. This is going to be a test of patience and trust and a long journey. And if you’ve ever met me you know that patience and trust is not typically how I roll.