What to do?

What do you to when life is kicking your rear?

When your hormones and ovaries are still all good and jacked up?

When you and Husband own your own business and there are more things to do than hours in the day?  Difficult decisions, hard work, long hours, and responsibility that weighs more than you thought?

When you’re raising a strong-willed child and you’re at your wits end?  When you realize that parenting isn’t all its cracked up to be and all the wisdom you had before you actually had kids was a freaking joke?

When you are so tired you feel like a bus ran you over, not once, but like five times?

When you can’t catch your breath and wonder if the weight will crush you?

When there are relationships to be maintained and built?

Where there are more dreams and goals and hopes than it seems like one person should have?

When there are paths to be walked and forks to be decided on?

When you know all the “right” answers and verses?  When you know the “right” words to say and think?  When you know the “right” things to do?  When the “right” things don’t really seem to make a difference?  When the “right” things don’t seem to make the mundane any easier or clearer or manageable or doable?

I don’t actually know.  But here I am.

Hoping and praying that His mercies are new every morning.  I know the “right” answer.  I know they are.  Every. Morning. ??  I know I made it through today, had to have a nap, meds, and Husband grilled out for dinner.  But we did it.  I lost my temper and yelled.  I withdrew.  I repented and then apologized.  I have hope for other people.  I completed a big task that I was putting off.  God was there all along.  It sure didn’t feel like it.

Gonna sleep tonight hoping for new mercies in the morning.  I need them.  I need new mercies in the morning.  Not that my day or world will be easier, but I believe the mercies will be there.  And I believe that God will help me believe.  Thank goodness.  Because all I have the energy for is to take a nap.

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8 thoughts on “What to do?

  1. Crystal

    I can completely sympathize, I don’t know if its the weather, depression, or what but I have been facing a lot if these same challenges and am so tired of carrying the weight of five people’s worlds on my shoulders. I know that as a mother that’s horrible to say but some days especially the last couple of months things have really become out if control… Hope your day today was better and thanks for sharing sometimes I forget that others have hard times too, but in a world where we only talk about the good things and post pics if the perfect moments sometimes its nice to see that everyone has their daily struggles…

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  2. Granny B

    There will always be troubles and trials. Take it from a older lady there there is NO perfitc(sp) day. We just keep trying and moveing on. I know there are things you want to do things that have to be done but if you don’t get it done thats o k because there will be another day. Sarah you have 2 beatiful girls and a very good husband. Some girls would say you have it all. If you need to cry on someones shoulder call me. We love you lots. Hang in there.

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  3. Praying for you friend. Definitely know the feelings you’re going through. But keep pressing, it’s not going to be this way forever. Things will look up, but every time those thoughts of self-pity or anger or “not fair” come in your mind, you have two choices: to dwell on them and let them totally ruin your day/week/month/etc, or you throw them at the foot of the cross for Jesus to deal with. I know that I tend to do the former more often than the latter, but I’m also a work in progress. Have you heard about the 1000 Gifts lady/blog? It’s really good. It’s about finding the things to be thankful for throughout your day even when things are really tough. Even when you totally feel justified in being angry and upset. Anyway, there isn’t an easy answer other than to keep going and trust Him. Miss you!

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